Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Groban.


Am I the only guy on the planet who doesn't like this guy's music?

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Shh!

I don't think anything makes my blood boil like getting shushed. Your thoughts?


Monday, August 4, 2008

Enclave Frisbee Invitational 2008

Ever wonder what happens when you put 5 guys, a lighted frisbee and a 10th floor balcony together at 1:00 AM?

The Format-
3 rounds.
1 throw per round.
The longest throw wins.

Now let's introduce the athletes...

Mike "Big Love" Hunter


Mike hails from Woods Cross and loves Asian girls.

Spencer Leland McKay


Spencer is from Payson. Spencer is currently writing a book, and making up his own language.

Paul Diehl


Paul is from the greater Seattle area. He also loves to eat my food... Seriously, your oreos and wheat thins are not safe around this guy.

Cody "Assistant to the Regional Manager" Fehlberg


Cody, of Orem, is best known for choking during the finals of every wrestling tournament his senior year. He's really good at getting 2nd place. side note- I had to use this picture of him laughing, because he's making an obscene gesture in the other one...

Yours truly


If this contest was based solely on rugged good looks, I would finish in at least the top 5.

Round 1 - Cody came out strong and put out his best toss of the evening. Paul and the rest had a pretty mediocre showing.

Round 2 - Kyle blows everyone away with his beautiful form, but an unfortunate gust of wind blows his frisbee left and he assumes the 2nd place position. Spencer has a nice toss that is good enough for 3rd place. Paul continues to suck.

Round 3 - Everyone has a meltdown. This is easily the worst round for all the contestants.

Results -
1- Cody
2- Kyle
3- Spencer
4- Mike
5- Paul

The funny thing is, Paul talked the most trash going into this.

Highlight of the evening- me scaring Mike as he got off the elevator




video

Thursday, July 31, 2008

The War on the Shore




A couple weeks ago we took a nice trip up to Atlantic City to watch Vai Sikahema fight Jose Canseco. For those of you who haven't been to Atlantic City, it's a lot like Las Vegas, only dirtier with more pigeons/ Italians. The properties in Monopoly are all taken from the names of streets in Atlantic City. The ironic thing is, you can't find free parking anywhere! Marc finally arrived on a greyhound bus from NYC and we headed off to meet our good friend and Philadelphia Eagle, Reno Mahe. We met up at a beach house on the Atlantic City shore, ate some delicious ribs, walked around the beach and then eventually headed off to the stadium for the fight.

The exhibition fights were entertaining. Some were legitimate boxers, while others looked like fights that Kimball and I used to have when we were younger-- lots of eye gouging, low blows and head butting... Before the main event there was a fire juggler guy and a bunch of large Polynesian guys who did the haka in the ring. It was sweet. The actual fight was great. The crowd was wild. The fight was over after about 1:30 in the first round. Vai beat Jose like Jack Bauer beats down terrorists. (Side note- after the fight, Vai disarmed a canister of nerve gas that was hidden in the arena by a member of the Canseco entourage.)

After the fight we headed off to a couple of after-parties with Vai, Reno and a slew of other former and current NFLers. I also had crab for the first and last time in my life.

All in all, it was the best night of my life. Or at least the best night of the week. Plus I had some free crab.




Monday, June 30, 2008

Google Analytics and My Encounter With Michael Jackson




Not long ago I found out that you can actually track the number of hits your blog receives daily, as well as where the people who visit your blog are located. So I added the tracking code to my blog (this took me a good hour or so to figure out how to do) and sat back to watch the counter start putting up big numbers... It would be a daunting task for any one man to number and keep track of the vast legion of faithful readers who subscribe to this blog, but google analytics did it: 125 people from 4, count em, 4 countries! My guess is that at least 53 of those visits are from one devoted fan. Thanks Mom!

In an effort to have the number of visits double in the next week, I have given this post a title that I hope will result in a larger number visitors from search engines. This is more an experiment than anything else. Check back later for more news.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Things I think are kinda white-trashy






1) Bumper stickers.
2) Mud flaps with cartoon characters on them.
3) Women who are good at pool.
4) Pocket knives with wooden handles.
5) North Plains, OR.
6) UNLV fans.
7) People who yell "Shut up!" at their pets.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Why I love my job

As you probably know, I am living in the Washington DC area selling animated scripture stories door to door. Door to door salesmen are one of the most despised salesmen that exist. Only telemarketers and those guys in the T-Mobile booth who stop you in the mall are more annoying. Needless to say, my job is not one for the faint of heart or those who are easily discouraged. So far this summer I have done pretty well for myself. It seems that sales is mostly about making the people feel comfortable. You make them laugh, tell some good stories, and then go in for the kill! Last Friday I had a rather tough sale with a certain Mrs. Anderson. She came to the door and immediately let me know that she most did not want any of what I was selling. She informed me that she had already seen the presentation and didn't like the way we did things... 1 hour later we were still on the doorstep, only she was sitting down on the doorstep surrounded by DVDs and potential bonuses that she would get if she ordered. I was riding the gravy train to yet another sale when all of a sudden, a potential disaster loomed on the horizon. Her husband came home. Now normally this is either good or awful- the husband comes home to find a salesman in his home, with his wife, who is about to spend a substantial chunk of his money. Thanks to some quick thinking by me, and an episode of Family Guy (which I can't find a link for) I used the following line as he came up the walk towards me: "Well hello brother Anderson. I was just about sell you some handsome cream, but I can see you've already bought out the store!" 10 minutes later I walked off that front porch having sold about 4 sets of scripture cartoons to a nice unsuspecting family. I love this job.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Biggest Blockbuster Disappointment Ever!

I should have known. When I first heard that they were making a new Indiana Jones movie, I should have known that it would never measure up to the originals. But somehow I hoped that maybe this time George Lucas would hit a grand slam after loading the bases with the first three films. We got tickets for the 10:30 showing and headed into downtown Silver Spring for some fine adventure cinema. The verdict: this movie sucked. I started dozing off after about 20-25 minutes. at the 40 minute mark I gave in and laid down on the open seats next to me. Luckily this theater is fairly new and you can put the arm rests up... I don't want to spoil the movie for anyone-- and really, I can't, on account of how I slept through until the credits-- but maybe by reading this "review" your expectations will be lowered and you'll have a better experience than I did. All in all I give the movie a C+ (that's generous, mind you). However, I give the nap I took an A-. I was exhausted from a long week of making ridiculous money... Highlights from the evening come mostly from our trip to the International House of Pancakes after the nap that I paid $10.25 to take. Several times during the movie/napping I remember having the thought, "freak, turn it down!" If you're considering seeing this movie, I would recommend you stay in and maybe pop in an episode of Lost or two... or seven.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Dropping in on honest Abe


So guess what? My car got towed AGAIN! I couldn't believe it. In the end I got it back for free and everything was ok, but man... I really dislike those tow truck folk and their ridiculous policies.

Today we drove downtown to DC and went to a few of the sights. We walked by the Washington monument (which is bigger than you might think), the WWII monument and stopped by the Lincoln Memorial. I was really impressed with the Lincoln Memorial. On Lincoln's right the Gettysburg address is carved in the wall. To his left is his inaugural speech from his second term. I was really impressed with the inaugural speech-- it quotes the Bible several times and makes several references to God. Standing in the memorial I had a few minutes to think about the speech and about how lucky we are to live in this free country. It was great to have those patriotic feelings stirred up again. I can't wait for the fourth of July! What better place could you be in for the celebration of our freedom than the capitol? America rocks. We really do live in the greatest country in the world.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Tow Truck Drivers = Servants of Satan

Tow truck drivers could be the 5th most horrible people in the history of the world behind Stalin, Bin Laden, Percy from the Green Mile and Johnny from the Cobra Kai dojo... So today I woke up and promptly told Cody about the weird dream I had where I was in a strange, yet luxurious bathroom. All of a sudden a girl I once took out and her brothers and sisters (I don't even know if she has any in reality) came in and started asking me what kind of shampoo I use. In the dream it made total sense and was not strange at all, it's only when I write that down that I realize how strange that sounds. But I digress... So I had a good shower, shaved, got dressed and was all set to go visit the Elwell family and see if they had any referrals they could pass on to me. I walked out to the parking lot only to find that my car was gone. At this point I figured that one of 3 things had happened: 1) I had been towed. 2) My car was stolen. Or 3) One of my prankster roommates was having some fun at my expense... It turns out the car was towed because my car doesn't have license plates on it and the trip permit is expired. $130 dollars later I got my car back from Henry's towing. This was the second time in as many months that my car has been towed. The first time I was towed I was so mad that I went to the bank and got $121.00 in quarters, nickels and dimes to pay the fee. At the last minute I wussed out and just paid with a credit card. I briefly considered paying in change this time, but decided against it. But hey, on the bright side, we're going to start working out tomorrow morning- I've got to get in shape before the cruise in November.

Also, FYI, I use Pantene Pro-V ... I use Titleist Pro-V1 golf balls, too. Weird.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

See the USA in a Chevrolet... Or Honda... Whatever.


After two and a half days, 2,065 miles, and about 60 gallons of gas, I made it! We set off from Ogden after a few days of training and hit the open road. Driving across the country let me see states that I had absolutely zero desire to see. Let's review the drive state by state...


Utah-- (Thursday 4:00 pm)

We left Ogden and made our way up I-80 to our friendly neighbor to the east, Wyoming.

Highlights- 1) Henefer.

Wyoming-- (Thursday night)

Highlights- 1) Getting 40 mpg until Evanston 2) Stopping in Laramie to get gas, and seeing a guy in his 60's selling switchblades, butterfly knives and brass knuckles in the gas station. 3) Sleeping in the Cheyenne Motel- this place was so disgusting that I slept on top of the blankets until about 4 AM when I woke up freezing and got under the top blanket. 4) Successfully leaving the state WITHOUT contracting some sort of disease.

In Wyoming I remembered a quote by Lavell Edwards, "I'd rather lose and live in Provo than win and live in Laramie." I agree...


Nebraska-- (Friday morning/early afternoon)

Nebraska was a pleasant surprise. Once we passed through the western part of the state, the landscape went from brown to greenish brown. I liked Omaha.

Highlights- 1) Kimberly the Assistant Manager KFC who laughed hysterically at everything we said. Kimberly also spoke Spanish surprisingly well.


Iowa-- (Friday evening)

Iowa was everything you'd expect it to be- rolling hills, farms, and country folk.

Highlights- 1) Getting out at the Kum and Go gas station in Boonesville and having it smell EXACTLY like Grandpa Salmon. 2) Briefly considering buying a Kum and Go gas station t-shirt, but ultimately deciding against it. 3)Getting a mediocre beef brisket at a BBQ place in Des Moines. 4) One of the guys in our little caravan getting lost, despite the fact that he had a GPS system in his car. 5) Cody getting upset about #4.


Illinois-- (Friday night/ Saturday morning)

Well, after having slept in the Cheyenne roach motel, we were all a little hesitant to stay in another cheap hotel after our Wyoming experience. So we roll into Joliet, a Chicago suburb, at around 1:00 am central time, find the local church building, pull out our blankets and pillows, and curled up under the stars and the stake center's satellite dish for a good 5 hours' rest. We got up around 6 and headed out.

Highlights- 1) Feeling safer sleeping on cement outside the church than I did in a motel room in Wyoming. 2) Delicious french toast sticks from BK.


Indiana-- (Saturday morning)

So Indiana was SWEET! I would totally live there.

Highlights- 1) The whole drive 2) Driving through South Bend, where Notre Dame is located.


Ohio-- (Saturday afternoon)

I had been in Ohio only once before, on a church history trip. This time was almost as good.

Highlights- 1) Driving by Bowling Green and reminiscing about my days studying abroad in St. Petersburg with the kids from Bowling Green. I wonder how they are doing...


Pennsylvania-- (Saturday afternoon)

Pennsylvania was nice, it was good to see some green. I'm surprised at how lush it is in the suburbs of these big, metropolitan cities.

Lowlights- 1) Paying $14.75 to the toll booth lady because I didn't get a ticket at a previous booth. This kinda left a bitter taste in my mouth... PA can secede from the union for all I care...


Maryland-- (Saturday afternoon)

So we finally made it to Silver Spring at 5:55 pm, which was great because the office was closing at 6:00, and we had to get there to give them our deposit. phew!

Highlights- 1) Remembering that people out here don't need to use their turn signals when changing lanes-- Yeah, apparently you just get over if you want to... It's wild.

That's it for now. Check back for updates!

Monday, April 14, 2008

Re-taking classes

You what the best part of re-taking a class is? You don't have to write any papers, because you already did them last semester! YES!

In other news, Things I'm excited for:
1) Finals to be done
2) The upcoming summer in our nation's capitol. (Mostly I'm excited for fun interactions with sassy african americans! Provo is a little lacking in that dept.)
3) This... Only the fall version

Tuesday, March 18, 2008